I love my job. I love my job so much that sometimes it nearly bring me to tears. Life isn't easy. My job isn't easy. Relationships aren't easy. But photography has been the one constant my entire adult life. I have changed friends, where I live, boyfriends, perceptions on the world... pretty much everything about my life has been in flux since I first picked up a camera at age 13. Everything in my life changes, except that camera. Everything in life changes except my deep connection and need for photography-- my love of creating.
I don't need to tell you, reality can be harsh and sometimes your dreams seems so distant. The brutality of reality can stare you right in the face, and you can also forget the beauty that is out there. My camera and photography, however, have always connected me with that beauty even in the ugliest of times. Whether the ugliness was within or forces I could not control, I could see past it with my vision as a photographer. If you have a passion in life, you'll understand the importance of this driving and lasting love. When other love fades, when your life has loss or uncertainty, that passion can remain.
People always ask me what draws me to photography. My list could go on forever. I am an explorer at heart. I love to experience new things and record these experiences, and photography is one way to do so. I love the doors and hearts that photography opens to me. Photography even helps me to understand and appreciate myself when this seems difficult.
Recently I have been thinking a lot about dreams. I don't mean dreams as in goals, or even dreams as when you are sleeping. Instead, I mean the visions that dance around in my head. The way that I wish reality was. Or the reality that I sometimes can escape to in my thoughts.
Being a fashion and fine art photographer can be magic because I can make the dreams and visions in my head a reality. I am a creator. My art and my images are my children right now. I can turn both dreams into reality, AND my reality into a dream. I get to see my visions manifested in front of my camera or on my computer screen. I can create beauty that never existed in the world, except inside my head, and then share that beauty with others. Perhaps its not as noble as it feels, but it does feel amazing to bring beauty into the world, and beauty as my mind defines it.
Photography has been my way to understand myself. It has been my constant in life. It has been my way of communicating my inner self with others in a way I couldn't imagine otherwise. It is my escape. It is my way to love life by embracing and creating beauty. I could not imagine my life, my development as an adult, and my passion in general without photography.
I hope that you reading this now have a passion that fulfills you. It changes the entire experience of being and feeling alive. If you do, please feel free to share.